Tracy Wilcox/PGA TOUR through Getty Bubba Watson
Three years faraway from what Bubba Watson refers to as his “all-time low,” the golfer is concentrated on his development and never afraid of revisiting the laborious instances.
In his new memoir, Up & Down — which was launched earlier this month — Watson will get candid about grappling with extreme nervousness so intense and debilitating that at one level he misplaced a big quantity of weight and puzzled if his life was ending.
“I can attempt to share my story, speak concerning the issues that assist me, and hopefully shine a lightweight on the psychological facet — not solely from an entertainer, a sportsman like myself, however individuals on the whole — as a result of we’re all going via one thing, I imagine,” Watson tells PEOPLE.
The 2-time Masters winner, 43, says every thing got here to a head in 2017, after “years and years of buildup.” Seeing hurtful and unfavorable feedback about himself on social media, Watson explains, slowly chipped away at his psychological well being.
“And so all this build-up, now it leads into chasing [being No. 1 in the world] and also you simply maintain including and including,” he recounts. “So I am letting my job dictate how I really feel. And so now ’17 hits and I used to be dropping pounds. So I went to the physician, checked on my coronary heart. I used to be having abdomen pains, all these illnesses had been happening. However the physician stated, ‘There’s nothing improper with you. Your coronary heart’s superb. You are respiratory. Your lungs are good. Your liver, your kidneys. Blood work is nice. So I do not know what to let you know.’ “
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Matthew Lewis/R&A/R&A through Getty Bubba Watson in 2017
The unexplained 30-pound weight reduction was particularly alarming for Watson, as he watched his dad Gerry Watson undergo via most cancers main as much as his demise in 2010. “After I regarded within the mirror, once I noticed 162 lbs. on the size, I envisioned my dad and envisioned me dying like my dad,” he admits.
“I fell to my knees in 2017, after seeing that weight and I stated, ‘Lord, take me,’ ” recounts Watson. “It wasn’t that I wished to finish my life. It was that I wished my household to not undergo this. I do know what my mother went via. I do know what I went via. Individuals round me went via with seeing my dad. So I do not need my spouse to undergo this or my two youngsters [Caleb and Dakota].”
Candidly, the golfer tells PEOPLE he was “envisioning demise, envisioning I am simply dying, consuming me away inside. And so I needed to voice it to get higher. And that is what I did.”
Speaking together with his spouse Angie Watson, he says, was releasing and helped him understand that he was holding onto nervousness and stress, a lot so it was resulting in abdomen ache and, finally, weight reduction.
Exiting that difficult 12 months, Watson says, he was on an upward march and prioritized communication increasingly more. He battled the stigma that males should not speak about their feelings and emotions, studying that it was okay to talk to his family members, buddies and colleagues concerning the good and unhealthy moments in life.
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That, Watson explains, finally led to Up & Down. He’d been approached for years to write down about his successes on the PGA Tour, however did not really feel like he might obtain something in sharing his story. It was after that “darkish time,” that Watson realized he was prepared to really introduce his followers to “Bubba, the individual.”
“And so now speaking to you, sharing my e book, that is very easy for me as a result of what I am getting out of it’s constructive suggestions,” he explains. “It is not like hitting a nasty golf shot and also you see the unhealthy end result. I do know from expertise that by speaking about it and discussing it, it helps me, however hopefully in return, it helps different individuals.”
Up & Down is offered to buy now.